Woody Allen Quotes

818 quotes · Director, Actor, Writer

Page 29 of 50

Woody Allen Quotes

All Funny Philosophical Angry Love Spiritual 818 quotes · page 29 of 50

Woody Allen

Director, Actor, Writer

Funny

“There is no justice, there is no rational structure to it [life]. That is just the way it is, and each person figures out some way to cope.”

Way Justice Structure

♥ 10

Woody Allen

Director, Actor, Writer

Philosophical

“If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.”

Philosophy Atheist Witty

♥ 10

Woody Allen

Director, Actor, Writer

“It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.”

Funny Humor

♥ 10

Funny

“There's no rhyme or reason to anything that I do. It's whatever seems right at the time.”

Reason Seems

♥ 9

Creative

“All i have in my life is my imagination”

Life Is Imagination My Imagination

♥ 10

Funny

“It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.”

Love Angel

♥ 10

Funny

“Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.”

Inspirational Funny

♥ 10

Funny

“By now they had mastered my own language, but they still made simple mistakes, like using 'hermeneutics,' when they meant 'heuristic'.”

Mistake Simple Heuristics

♥ 10

Nostalgic

“I would not like to live in the past because you don't get anesthetic when you go to the dentist. You don't get antibiotics. You don't get the things that you are used to now, cell phones and televisions and things that are very convenient. You don't want that. But, it would be fun if you could, every now and then, just meet a friend for lunch at Maxim's in Paris in 1900, or go back to 1870 just for a couple of hours, take a walk in the park, and then come right back to Broadway.”

Past Fun Couple

♥ 10

Grateful

“I've had a very productive life. I've worked very hard, I've never fallen prey to depression. I'm not sure I could have done all of that without being in psychoanalysis.”

Done Prey Productive Life

♥ 10

Funny

“I've inherited the worst of each parent. I have my father's hypochondria and lack of concentration. I have his amorality. I have everything bad that he had. Then I have my mother's surly, pill-like, complaining, whining attitude.”

Mother Father Attitude

♥ 9

Funny

“I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.”

Home Sitting Distraction

♥ 9