Sarcastic Quotes

907 quotes · 501 authors Page 30 of 50

All moods Philosophical Creative Funny Angry Spiritual Courageous 907 quotes · page 30 of 50

Playwright, Critic

“It is a noteworthy fact that kicking and beating have played so considerable a part in the habits which necessity has imposed on mankind in past ages that the only way of preventing civilized men from beating and kicking their wives is to organize games in which they can kick and beat balls.”

Past Sports Sarcastic

♥ 6

George Will

Political Commentator, Author

“Creative semantics is the key to contemporary government; it consists of talking in strange tongues lest the public learn the inevitable inconveniently early.”

Keys Sarcastic Sarcasm

♥ 6

Mark Twain

Writer, Humorist

“What are the proper proportions of a maxim? A minimum of sound to a maximum of sense.”

Writing Inspirational

♥ 6

Mark Twain

Writer, Humorist

“Had double chins all the way down to his stomach.”

Way Funny

♥ 6

Neil Simon

Playwright

“Gee, what a terrific party. Later on we'll get some fluid and embalm each other.”

Funny Party Sarcastic

♥ 6

Mark Twain

Writer, Humorist

“Germany, the diseased world's bathhouse.”

World Sarcastic

♥ 6

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Poet, Playwright, Novelist

“When ideas fail, words come in very handy.”

War Sarcastic

♥ 6

Lewis Thomas

Physician, Author

“Ants are so much like human beings as to be an embarrasment...They do everything but watch television.”

Watches Sarcastic Sarcasm

♥ 6

Barack Obama

Politician

“Now, because he knows that his economic theories don't work, he's been spending these last few days calling me every name in the book. Lately he's called me a socialist for wanting to roll-back the Bush tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans so we can finally give tax relief to the middle class. I don't know what's next. By the end of the week he'll be accusing me of being a secret communist because I shared my toys in kindergarten. I shared my peanut butter and jelly sandwich.”

Book Funny Sarcastic

♥ 5