Demetri Martin Quotes

494 quotes · Comedian, Actor

Page 22 of 42

Demetri Martin Quotes

All Funny Creative Love Nostalgic Hopeful 494 quotes · page 22 of 42

Comedian, Actor

Happy

“I like birthdays because we celebrate life with cakes. It's so cool. Sometimes when I see a baby, I'm like that much more cake in the world. But then when someone dies, I'm like the cake streak is over.”

Funny Humor Baby

♥ 5

Demetri Martin

Comedian, Actor

Funny

“There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less and less comfortable over time.”

Thinking Funny Humor

♥ 5

Funny

“At any minute, I am four minutes from a poncho.”

Four Minutes

♥ 5

Funny

“Fire truck with back end on fire drives really fast in circles.”

Fire Circles

♥ 5

Funny

“I walk around and think about things. When I come across a thought that makes me laugh, I write it down. Then, at night, I say the thought to people through a microphone. I don't think about politics or pop culture very much, so those thoughts don't often make it to the microphone.”

Thinking Writing Night

♥ 5

Love

“I love catching a snapshot of something that is just about to happen. Or maybe something that just happened, you know. But I like especially that just-before kind of feeling.”

Feelings Kind Snapshots

♥ 5

Funny

“A glove is a very literal looking hand puppet.”

Hands Puppets

♥ 5

Funny

“A human head looks the least scary when it is attached.”

Looks Humans

♥ 5

Happy

“I like birthdays. Every time someone is born, that's just like bringing more cake into the world.”

World Born Cake

♥ 5

Funny

“Sometimes I feel like I'm making a connection with a stranger, but then it turns out I'm not. Like, I was in a mall, and I saw this lady hitting her kid. So I went up to her, and I was like, "Yeah, get him!" She got all mad at me. I was like, "I'm on your side here."”

Kids Funny Your Side

♥ 4

Adventurous

“Knights would have probably liked refrigerator magnets.”

Knights Magnet

♥ 5

Adventurous

“The definition of adventure depends upon how boring your life is.”

Life Is Adventure

♥ 5