Winston Churchill — Funny Quotes

140 quotes · Politician, Writer, Historian

Page 9 of 12

Winston Churchill Quotes

All Courageous Philosophical Funny Angry Wise 140 quotes · page 9 of 12

Winston Churchill

Politician, Writer, Historian

Funny

“Do you know why the nose of the bull dog is sloped backwards? So it can keep on breathing without ever letting go.”

Dog Letting Go Breathing

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Winston Churchill

Politician, Writer, Historian

Funny

“It is impossible to obtain a conviction for sodomy from an English jury. Half of them don't believe that it can physically be done, and the other half are doing it.”

Believe Done Half

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Funny

“Building slow destroyers ! One might as well breed slow race horses.”

Race Horse

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Funny

“There's no such thing as a good tax.”

Taxes Funny Income Tax

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Funny

“Champagne is the wine of civilization and the oil of government.”

Government Civilization Wine

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Funny

“His name is Rufus II-but the II is silent.”

Names Dog

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Funny

“The maxim of the British people is 'business as usual.'”

People Business

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Funny

“Don't be careless about yourselves--on the other hand not too careful. Live well but do not flaunt it. Laugh a little and teach your men to laugh--get good humor under fire--war is a game that's played with a smile. If you can't smile, grin. If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can.”

Men War Caring

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Funny

“There was a man who sold a hyena skin while the beast still lived and who was killed in hunting it.”

Men Life Hunting

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Funny

“Mr. Gladstone read Homer for fun, which I thought served him right.”

Fun Political

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Funny

“When they told me that by the year 2100 women would rule the world, my reply was 'Still?'”

Years World

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Funny

“When I'm in office I always keep Members of Parliament talking. If they stopped they might start thinking.”

Thinking Talking Office

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