Terry Pratchett — Funny Quotes

514 quotes · Author

Page 25 of 43

Terry Pratchett Quotes

All Funny Philosophical Angry Creative Wise 514 quotes · page 25 of 43

Terry Pratchett

Author

Funny

“I keep vaguely wondering what Macs are like, but the ones I've seen spend too much time being friendly.”

Too Much Wonder Friendly

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Terry Pratchett

Author

Funny

“In all seriousness, people think that it's the ideas that are important. Well, everyone has ideas, all the time. I tend to write mine down and remember them, but at some point you have to apply the bum to the seat and knock out about sixty five thousand words - that's how long a novel is.”

Thinking Writing Ideas

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Funny

“I dinna trust him," said Slightly Mad Angus. "He reads books an' such.”

Book Said

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Funny

“Everything is a test.”

Tests

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Funny

“An Assassin, a real Assassin had to look like one-black clothes, hood, boots, and all. If they could wear any clothes, any disguise, then what could anyone do but spend all day in a small room with a loaded crossbow pointed at the door?”

Real Doors Small Rooms

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Funny

“People are bound to get excited when they see a ten-million-ton starship trying to fly down the street.”

People Trying Excited

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Funny

“It is at this point that normal language gives up, and goes and has a drink.”

Giving Up Language

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Funny

“Occasionally he would very nearly swear.”

Swear

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Funny

“He's probably their battle poet, too." "You mean he makes up heroic songs about famous battles?" "No, no. He recites poems that frighten the enemy....When a well-trained gonnagle starts to recite, the enemy's ears explode.”

Mean Song Enemy

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Funny

“That, lad," he said proudly, "was some of the worst poetry I have heard for a long time. It was offensive to the ear and a torrrture to the soul....We'll make a gonnagle out of ye yet!”

Long Soul Ears

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Funny

“I don't see what's so triffic about creating people as people and then gettin' upset 'cos they act like people.”

People Creating Upset

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Funny

“You were safe on a troll. Anyone wanting to mug a troll would have to use a building on a stick.”

Use Safe Sticks

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