Jeaniene Frost Funny Quotes — Page 11

Author

Funny

“It's fine, Mencheres. Though if you'd told me I was about to meet such a legendary vampire, I would have grabbed the nicer silk drapery to wear instead," she replied, meeting Vlad's coppery green gaze with an arched brow.”

Vampire Green Legendary

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Jeaniene Frost

Author

Funny

“Dave and Tate were dressed with equal heinousness. More black leather, chains, and whips. Either Don’s staff truly had costumes for all possible occasions on hand, or someone at wardrobe had a lot of explaining to do.”

Hands Black Costumes

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Funny

“Bring me liquor, Bones, fast, to take my foot out of my mouth. Cat to Bones”

Feet Cat

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Funny

“I'm great as bait! All the vampires want to eat me!”

Want Vampire

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Funny

“He picked the wrong profession. Should've stayed a prostitute. He'd have made millions. - Cat”

Should Made Cat

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Funny

“This was a dream. A very bad, bad dream, brought on by liver poisoning from too many gin and tonics. Here it was, a deal with the devil. At what price my soul? He watched me expectantly and threateningly all at the same time. If I said no, I knew what would happen. Save the glass, waitress, I’m drinking from the bottle! Happy hour, with my neck on tap. If I said yes, I’d be agreeing to a partnership with pure evil.”

Dream Drinking Glasses

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Funny

“I don't mind foreigners. God save the queen!" he squeaked and ran.”

Mind Queens

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Funny

“Slumber party with Dracula, all things considerd why not?”

Party Why Not

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Funny

“MTV and video games have solved that problem as far as most of humanity goes. That, and telly, as it were.” “Telly?” Who was that? He grunted in amusement. “Television, of course. Don’t you speak English?” “You sure don’t,” I muttered. Shaking his head, he frowned at me.”

Games Mtv Speak English

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Funny

“Sneaky, manipulating, merciless bloodsucker . . ." A chuckle drifted up to me. "Pillow talk already? You'll have me hard before we're even back in our room.”

Rooms Sneaky Bloodsuckers

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Funny

“A human hires a hit man to kill his cousin for money, boring. That same hit man botches the job twice, funny. Then �the desperate hit man sends a ghoul after the girl to finish things up, my curiosity's piqued. That same ghoul ends up with his head cut off by a mysterious redhead . . . Ah. Now I'm interested.”

Jobs Girl Cousin

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Funny

“Shame on you, Crispin. Married how long, and you haven't spanked your wife with a metal spatula yet?" I'd gotten used to Ian's assumption that everyone was as perverted as he was, so I didn't miss a beat. "We prefer blender beaters for our kitchen utensil kink," I said with a straight face. Bones hid his smile behind his hand, but Ian looked intrigued. "I haven't tried that ... oh, you're lying, aren't you?" "Ya think?" I asked with a snort. Ian gave a sigh of exaggerated patience and glanced at Bones. "Being related to her through you is a real trial.”

Thinking Real Lying

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Jeaniene Frost — Funny Quotes

Jeaniene Frost Quotes